Question 1 Bros over Hoes/Chicks over Dicks

Ladies and Gentlemen of the eJury.

I pose to you an age old question of whether it is ever ok for a friend to have relations with a friend’s ex. Well is it ok? Ever?

Those of us who follow a less than absolute moral code will instantly say that their are exceptions to the rules of bro’s over hoes, and chicks over dicks.

The exceptions are as follows:

  1. Your friend didn’t date this girl or guy for a long time (one or two night stand)
  2. The relationship between your friend and their ex wasn’t serious (highschool fling, no sex)
  3. Your friend and their ex have been broken up for an extended period of time (This time period is relative, but the longer the better)
  4. I’m running out of excuses
  5. The girl/guy is too hot for you to turn down
  6. Real, and I’m talking genuine feelings, not just lusty-I-wanna-be-on- you-feelings, are shared between you and your friend’s ex
  7. Your friend has given you the ‘all clear’ for landing
  8. It was just a one night stand for you and your friend’s ex, and it will never happen again, and #’s 1, 2, or 3
  9. you’re not really that close of a friend to this guy/girl

Out of all the exceptions listed above (let me know if you can think of any more) the seventh is of paramount importance.

Also, you must use your own discretion and common sense. Your friend, feeling awkward about you even asking to for the all clear, might just say that he or she doesn’t care when in fact they actually do.

As crude as Bros over Hoes over Chicks over Dicks sounds, it references one of the most important bonds any of us can share with another human being: Friendship.

And before you proceed to answer this age old question, you must consider what is more important to you; your friend’s feelings, or your own gratification.

Quite the conundrum, n’est-ce pas?

Until next time,

Tuck in your shirt and please try to stay classy Internet,

Yours Cooly,

Black Ty

Collision Course – 1 page screenplay

This is a 1-page screenplay I wrote for a competition I entered.

My critics say the end was too cliche. I hope this happens to them >:-)

 

 

Collision Course

By

Black Ty

 

 

FADE IN:

INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT

ANONIMOUS MAN sleeping in a bed. His eyes open. He is awake. Sirens blare outside. He can hear people shouting. His mind starts racing with questions. All of which he asks himself aloud while laying on his back.

ANONIMOUS MAN

Why is it so damn hot in here? Where the hell am I? How did I get here? What’s with the sirens? Did I go out last night? Whose bed am I in? This is not my apartment. Those are not my posters on the wall. These are definitely not my pink sheets. Why am I just in my boxers and socks? Where are my clothes?

He sits up in the bed and tries to make sense of his situation, looking around the room for his pants. He notices that the television is on. The volume is low. It’s the news. A FEMALE REPORTER is saying something that seems important.

ANONIMOUS MAN

Hmmm…I usually fall asleep watching porn.

He isn’t able to make out what she is saying before the sudden change in altitude throws him into a mental maelstrom.

ANONIMOUS MAN

Whoa! How many roofies was I fed last night? My head is pulsating violently; pounding against the walls of my skull as if something were trying to get out.

He lays back down in the bed, rubbing his temples and wincing in pain.

ANONIMOUS MAN

What’s with those damn sirens? Whatever’s going on it is close because I can see the lights flashing in the window. I think I just heard a scream but I’m sure I’m wrong.

He looks down his nose at the television.

ANONIMOUS MAN

Why does it seem like the news is on a continuous loop? She sounds scared. Is she just saying the same thing over and over again? Or am I just that ruined? What’s this in the bed beside me? Is it my cell phone?

As his fingers take hold of it, he is momentarily relieved with the thought of being able to call for help.

ANONIMOUS MAN

No, it’s just the remote control for the T.V. Let me turn this up a little and hope my head doesn’t explode.

He sits up slowly, resting his back on the bed head. He turns up the volume. The reporter is fighting back sobs as she delivers some very bleak news. His mind stops racing with questions; he is focused on what she has to say.

His first instinct is to dismiss this as another media spectacle in which empathy is feigned for more compelling television.

Then he hears what she is saying.

….

 

 

Rhyme clout

My bars are all out of wack…wrote this maybe 4 years ago

 

I can’t always live for today

Because I’m fighting for change

And I’ll be damned if I have all my tomorrows be the same

So what’s really living for today then?

Is it just blazin and drinkin and till you wavin

good-bye through the hazin of the ways in

which you once thought

holmie don’t get caught

because that’s their plot

mental slavery for the babies to keep us in one spot

what happened to the Black Panthers?

The WeatherMan UnderGround?

in my search for answers

this here is what I found

 

Rage against the machine

Sidious was right, your anger gives you focus

It makes you stronger

you have fear you have hate but you don’t use them

you rather drown your pain and ignore revolution

so steadily its your body your abusing

but that’s the temple that soul moves in

tomorrow’s not promised, there’s truth in

that statement, but its an abatement

a natural detterent from the justice current

 

Like breaking up with the only girl you ever loved

Life’s a bitch then God must be a pimp up above

 

Niggaz still getting gats up in the club when they trying to

so keep your head on a swivel cuz these slugs they will find you

More times squeezing over infidelity and snitches

cuz their are two distinct kinds of bitches after your figures

ones with big butts who can’t keep they legs shut

and ones with no heart who squeal when they get caught

if info or ass was gas or basketball,

both kinds of bitches would not hesitate to pass it all

john stockton with the beast they getting mad assists

one year down the line, jake still cuffing your wrists

you hear the noise of backwards boyz who rat for toyz

taking a plea bargain like there was no other choice

stick to the code of the street and know your true enemy

 

 

 …and then it ends

 

apologies in advance for the language

and yes ladies, there is a difference between bitches and sisters.

 

“I LOVE MY SISTERS, BUT I AIN’T LOVE NO B!TCH!”  – JAY-Z

 

 

A poem about hearts

I wrote this a couple years ago, just found it, thought i’d share…

^great album, in stores now!

^great album, in stores now!

hearts, i’ve even broken a few
betrayed her’s and her trust
they were hurt and lied to
but only becuz mine was broken too
that should easily justify
the reason i was just the guy
who just gave you warmth
in just the right
way you liked it on the side
stallions you were quite the ride
but climbing back down’s
when sobreity’s found
where truth shines on blind eyes
and no soul can find shade
from rays that blast away
the mind’s haze
it is now that i thirst
completely distracted
after physical satisfaction
for a shared love
deeper than the wells of inaction
she dwells in a dark place
my lies cover my face
without her eyes to gaze into
all the earth’s beauty knows winter
no snow angel or sled
can mend my unnatural splinter
so i leave you alone
on a defiled lusty throne
knowing i’ve done you wrong
and walk alone
down a sunlit road
hoping that from a shadow
my lady will stroll
cross my path
and help me unfold
the greatest of love stories
whenever told
hearts, i’ve been true to a few