The King Is Dead. Long Live the King.

‘King of Pop’ Michael Jackson died today at the UCLA Medical Center after he was brought in by paramedics who found him not breathing at his home, according to various reports. Cardiac arrest is the supposed cause, although Jackson had been suffering from other ailments.

I, like so many of you, grew up listening to Michael Jackson. The Christmas album he recorded with his brothers still plays in my house every year. The timeless energy of his songs dominate old and new school jams alike, lending courage to listeners world wide who would dare try to emulate his swag on the dance floor. The Moon Walk. The leg kick. The pop locking. The crotch grab. The scream. The hat throw. The glove. The red leather jacket. The hair. The white socks andblack shoes.

That infectious smile.

No matter the scandals, no matter the personal issues. No matter how you remember him…The music my friends, ‘The Way You Make Me Feel‘, ‘P.Y.T.’, ‘Billie Jean‘, ‘One More Chance‘!!! You know I could easily go on and on, because Mike was a musical genius. Most of us revered him for that and tried not to let his image be blemished by the hordes determined to see him fall from glory. To the haters, I say ‘Beat It‘, so you ‘Wanna Be Startin Something‘? ‘You know I’m Bad‘ right?! ‘Why you wanna trip on me‘?

Don’t trip. You know he got you open kid. Don’t front.

Rock With You!!!!!!’ “Girrrrrl, close your eyes/ Let that rhythm, get into to you/ Don’t try to fight it/ There ain’t nothin’ that you can do/ Relax your mind/ Lay back and groove with mine/ You gotta feel the heat!/ And we can ride the boogie/ Share that beat of luuuuuuv”

Sing it! I know you know the words!

What’s your favorite album?

Mine has to be Thriller, but how can you really choose?!

Off the Wall is just as Epic!

Here’s a list of his albums, dig them up, listen, pay homage to the KING!

* Got to Be There (1972)

* Ben (1972)

* Music and Me (1973)

* Forever, Michael (1975)

* Off the Wall (1979)

* Thriller (1982)

* Bad (1987)

* Dangerous (1991)

* HIStory (1995)

* Invincible (2001)

Earlier this year, Jackson announced his return to live performance with a series of 50 concerts in London, slated to begin July 13.

Rest in peace MJ. But listen up, because the entire world is bumping your music right now!

Stay Classy Mikey.

you've been hit've been struck by...a smooth criminal

you've been hit've been struck by...a smooth criminal

Bangkok Dangerous

would you retire already? how about Directing?

would you retire already? how about Directing?

“My name’s Joe. This is what I do.”

A hitman who’s in Bangkok to pull off a series of jobs falls for a local woman and bonds with his errand boy.

I did not think I was going to get through this whole thing.  Cage’s career has been on a constant down spiral ever since he refused to cut his hair and accept his receding hairline.

He did a worse job in Ghost Rider than Ben Affleck did in Daredevil; and I don’t think anybody thought that was possible. Peace to Affleck though who is directing more now and even manages to come off as believable in his latest roles (I can tell you have been working on your craft)

But I digress. Back to National Treasure part 2 star Nikolai Cagwoski.  Give it up already.  I hear you’re doing a comic book with your brother called Voodoo Child.  Maybe you should stick to that for a while, maybe make a movie out of it, give some black actors a shot.

I am looking forward to your role in the live action adaptation of the Kick Ass comic book.

Kick-Ass is an ongoing, creator-owned, American comic book series written by Mark Millar and illustrated by John Romita, Jr. It is published by Marvel Comics under the company's Icon imprint.

Kick-Ass is an ongoing, creator-owned, American comic book series written by Mark Millar and illustrated by John Romita, Jr. It is published by Marvel Comics under the company's Icon imprint.

I guess with a guy like you (a steady working actor the likes of Samuel L. Jackson) we are bound to get a shit load of crap movies in between your good ones.  I can’t think of one since Lord of War.

I’m gonna be watching Knowing after this…I’ll try to be merciful.

It’s funny that I have so much to write about a star I claim is fading from brilliance. Perhaps that’s because I loved Leaving Las Vegas so much or maybe it’s because Cage is a fellow comic book fan.

Anyhoo, Bangkok Dangerous is ok, it serves its purpose among the other assassin movies of its sort; namely allowing viewers to imagine the life of a professional killer with all its intricacies and professional hazards. It even has a little sequence where Cage instructs a civilian with the basics of how to be a killer. I give this stat stuffer of a movie 2/5 Bo-Ty’s.

sub-par action, bad scar tissue make-up, and that damn hair cut!

sub-par action, bad scar tissue make-up, and that damn hair cut!

With a special HITMAN rater to remind us of a movie and even moreso a video game that did it better.

class class class

class class class

Stay Classy.

The Lazarus Project

lazarus project
A former criminal is drawn into a criminal endeavor and subsequently finds himself living an inexplicable new life working at a psychiatric facility.

Starring Paul Walker, Piper Perabo and Malcolm Goodwin.  Not a bad film.  (SPOILER ALERT) Could have been great if they added something supernatural; maybe not on the part of his captors, but inside him rather.

I’ll give this 2.5/5 Bo-Ty’s.

not a total waste of time, but predictable after a while

not a total waste of time, but predictable after a while

Peep the trailer:

Special Joker rater for the crazies depicted in this flick.

why so serious?

why so serious?

Stay Classy.

Bottle Shock

drab humor

drab humor

The story of the early days of California wine making featuring the now infamous, blind Paris wine tasting of 1976 that has come to be known as “Judgment of Paris”.

New on DVD, Bottle Shock definitely ranks up there with movies like A Good Year and Sideways in their ability to make you want to drink good wine.

Mildy humoristic and pleasant, Alan Rickman’s straight face drab voice is kind of getting annoying to me now; he sounds the same in every movie. Chris Pine, now known for his role as Captain James Tiberius Kirk in this summer’s blockbuster reimagining of Stark Trek, has horrible hair in this. I’m not a homo, hell i’m not even half-a-fag, but his wig in this movie is worse than Halle Berry’s in X-Men 1.

I gotta have Faith

Eliza Dushku, who will always be Faith from Buffy the Vampire Slayer to me, is always a pleasure to behold. I gotta have Faith....BABE-AY!

Peep the trailer:

I give this corkomedy 2.5/5 Bo-Ty’s.

barely watchable

barely watchable

With a special snooty British man rater for the air of entitlement you’re sure to feel when you pour a glass of your fav (or whatever’s available) while watching this flick:

Stay Classy.

lah dee dah hoo hoo haaa root doot dooo

lah dee dah hoo hoo haaa root doot dooo


This Week @ The Movies: TRANSFORMERS ROTF

In what people (me and my friends) are calling the greatest movie ever made, Michael Bay returns viewers to the science fiction world where two factions of a robotic alien race battle over Earth’s hidden secrets and powers.

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen is not going to win any Oscars outside of best sound fx or best graphics. It will however dominate at all geek award shows like the Spike TV awards, MTV Movie Awards, Hugo etc. In fact, it is already being torn apart by critics on Rotten Tomatoes and by Roger Ebert himself.

Sorry old man, this movie was not made for you. This movie was made for all the people who packed theaters at midnight last night across North America wearing Transformers T-Shirts and playing transformer ringtones over and over, before, during, and after the movie on their cell phones.

This movie is for people who love a good action flick. More so, it is for people who grew up watching the original series, the movies, played with the toys, and went on from there to watch spinoff shows like Beast Wars and Beast Machines.

After catching the midnight screening last night I left the theater as one happy 26yr old kid; a huge smile across my face and pure joy in my heart. I’m going to see it again tonight and maybe again on the weekend in IMAX (which is apparently about 2mins longer than the regular version with added fight scenes).

leave it to cleavage

leave it to cleavage

Ladies, this makes a great date movie too, you’ll love the human elements and the dynamics in the relationship between Sam (Shia LaBeouf) and Michaela (Megan toe thumb Fox).

Things you may not like about this movie, but I didn’t mind:

1. The Twins: Foul mouthed twin robots who get a little too much screen time
2. Lack of dialogue for other robots: Ironhide, Ratchet, Sideswipe, Arcee, all have very limited screen time and lines
3. Devastator’s balls: just get over it and giggle
4. Sam’s Mom high on weed brownies: kind of unnecessary, but still funny

Transformers 3 plot hint: Tyrese, while observing Optimus Transform – “Kinda freaky huh? If God made us in his image. Who made them?” Look for Unicron and more old Transformers like Omega Supreme in the final chapter of the trilogy. (crosses fingers and hopes for parts 4,5,6)

I give this movie 5 out of 5 Bo-Ty’s.

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Tona ‘Fast Pace’ feat. Saukrates & T.R.A.C.K.S.

This Canadian MC from Toronto represents for the disenfranchized youth of the Chester Le housing community; a low income housing complex in Scarborough, Ontario. When he first got onto the rap scene it was in a rap group called YOUNG N.A.P.P.S., consisting of other local artists from his old neighbourhood. The name Tona came about because of his distinctive tone of voice, but he always use to compare his lifestyle at one point to the Daytona 500, so he incorporated the two (although he recently changed his name from Daetona to Tona due to fans confusing him with Black Jays affiliate Daytona from the Bronx).

Tona’s newest song ‘Fast Pace’ feat. Saukrates & T.R.A.C.K.S. is the 2nd single from the newly released, Direct Deposit LP.
Listen here.

Watch the video for ‘MAJOR’ from the Direct Deposit album:

Direct Deposit is the collaboration album between Tona & Lyve. The project is available on iTunes/Amazon & in stores across Canada now!

WWW.BIGTONA.COM New site up now!!
Tona is also on Myspace.

Tona – “Big Tone bout to set it set it, all my kick stand n!@@as gon’ let it let it leeeaaan. Hit em with the BOOM BAP! ORIGINAL RAP!” Black Ty Approved!

This Week @ The Movies

A Las Vegas-set comedy centered around three groomsmen who lose their about-to-be-wed buddy during their drunken misadventures, then must retrace their steps in order to find him. The movie stars Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, Zach Galifianakis, Mike Epps, Heather Graham, and Iron Mike Tyson. These comedies (Anchorman, Old School, Wedding Crashers, Superbad, I Love You Man) aren’t for everybody. They are for people with progressive youthful senses of humor. That being said, The Hangover is very very funny. This is Zach Galifianakis’ coming out party. I first saw him do a rendition of Kanye’s Can’t Tell Me Nothing, and then saw him in the Absolut Vodkda commercials. Zach steals the show in this one. I’ve already seen it twice, and did notice that it wasn’t as funny the second time around; plus they show way too many of the good jokes in the trailers. Still, I did notice things the second time around that I missed at first because I was laughing too hard so all in all this is a very good movie if you are a fan of laughing hysterically until you cry. Some call it dumb humor, I call it stupid-dumb hilarity.

I give this movie 4 out of 5 Bo-Ty’s:

With a special Harrison Ford as Dr. Indiana Jones rater for references to the satchel (man purse) he and Zach wear while letting the dogs out.

Peep the trailer:
Stay classy Internet,

Black Ty.